Have you ever caught yourself saying “I’m sorry” just for taking up space or needing a moment of your own time?
The Glimmer
Imagine the cool, smooth weight of a stone in your palm or the steady rhythm of your own breath.
In these moments, you are simply present. No apology is required for your existence.
“Boundaries are the distance at which I can love you and me simultaneously.” — Prentis Hemphill
I love this because it reminds us that boundaries aren’t walls; they are the shape of our self-respect.
The Somatic Shift
In our workshop, we’ve been noticing how “sorry” can be a reflexive “fawn” response—a way our nervous system tries to feel safe by over-accommodating.
By pausing to edit our emails and texts, we give our bodies a chance to catch up and realize we aren’t in danger.
Reframing Your Words
Try these shifts in your next message to practice standing in your own light:
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Instead of: “Sorry for the late reply.”
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Try: “Thank you for your patience.”
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Instead of: “Sorry to vent.”
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Try: “I appreciate you listening to me.”
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Instead of: “Sorry, I can’t make it.”
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Try: “I’m unable to attend, but I’m grateful for the invite.”
Actionable Tool: The Anchor Tap
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Sit quietly and feel the solid ground beneath your feet.
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Gently tap your collarbone with your fingertips, noticing the soft, rhythmic sound.
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As you tap, whisper: “I am allowed to exist without apology.”
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Feel the vibration of your voice in your chest and throat.
Join Me This Wednesday! April 1 at 2:00 PM ET: The Lighthouse: Withstanding Pushback. Learn to stand firm when others react to your new boundaries.
Listen to Previous Workshops | Get the Handouts
With warmth,
Coach Kaila Allen MWSCC
Hi, Kaila I love this.
Thanks for sharing.